Alzheimer's: A journey of memories
When my daughter was in preschool, I started noticing something going on with my mom. At first I wondered if she simply no longer wanted to make the drive from Kernersville to Raleigh to help out from time to time. She would frequently come stay with us if I had work events to cover or take Alicia to spend time at Nana & Papa’s to bond and give me a break. Eventually, I called my brother (he had two small children that mom loved to be with as well). We compared notes, wondering if she did not want to tell us “No” but had tired of helping.
We soon shared our concerns with our parents.
In response, they went to the Wake Forest Baptist Health Sticht Center, which focuses on Healthy Aging and Alzheimer's Prevention. While they were trying to sign up for a brain change study, they got the shocking news that my mom couldn't enter the study because she had Alzheimer's that had already progressed too far. She was 64 years old.
I had a young daughter very attached to her grandmother, and I was suddenly facing not only losing that connection, but my own as well. Devastated and terrified do not begin to explain how I felt.
At first I prayed that my daughter would at least get to be 10 years old before my Mom either sank so far into dementia that she did not know us or died. I realize that was an irrational thought and a very random number. But when faced with Alzheimer’s, normal reasoning quickly goes out the window…
My daughter is now a senior in high school, and my mom recently turned 76, living in a Memory Care facility in Greensboro. Mom no longer knows who we are but still enjoys spending time with us. It has truly been a journey, finding ways for me and Alicia to connect with my mom through the different stages of this horrendous disease. I have also learned a great deal about being the caught in the middle of taking care of my daughter and taking care of my mother.
I look forward to sharing some of our experiences with you all through WRAL's family section, in hopes it may help give you ideas, not feel so alone if you are experiencing the dementia journey with a loved one and enlighten those of you who have not had to deal with this devastating, incurable disease known as the “long goodbye.”
Helpful Resources:
Andrea Osborne is Capitol Broadcasting Company’s director of content. She has daughter in high school and a mother with Alzheimer’s and is a passionate advocate for both. She will be sharing her family’s journey here on WRAL’s family section.
